ARTEMIS'S STATE OF MIND
by EmbraceSadness
Summary: Black Canary gives them each a book. She tells them to write their thoughts and feelings in third person to see through another person's eyes as each day passes on. One day, Dick disappears. Artemis and Bart go after him. With the Team, League, and police after them, Artemis records each and every passing day in her book. She just hopes that with each entry, Wally can forgive her.
1. Chapter 1

Sometimes thinking is the hardest part.

It's like everytime she allows herself to lay in silence and gaze up at the blank ceiling above her, she begins to think about it all. About how long it has been. About how hard she tries to just forget about it all.

About _him_. About _losing him._

Everyday, she wishes that she could go back. Go back and change it all. Go back and maybe tell him she loved him one more time. Try to convince him not to go. To not put his life on the line for it.

But, of course, that was guaranteed when you put the suit on. Put the mask on.

And, now she has lost him. Lost him because of her stupidity and need to put on that damned costume. Lost him because she had decided to get back in the game way before he had. Lost him because, despite the fact that they had agreed to move on and leave it all behind, she had left _him_ behind at the first cry for help.

Wally had meant everything to her.

And now he was gone.

And Artemis doesn't know how to deal with that.


	2. Chapter 2

Sometimes, in the middle of the night, Artemis cries.

She cries really hard because she thought she saw the ghost of him, or felt him wrap his strong arms around her middle and whisper soft whispers of nothing into her ear.

 _Literally_ soft whispers of nothing. Wally is _nothing_.

No body, no hope, no goodbye. He's there one minute and gone the next. She knows what they say about speedsters though;

Sometimes, they're just too fast.


	3. Chapter 3

M'gann comes to visit sometimes. She soothes Artemis, runs her fingers through Artemis's tangled hair. Usually, she hasn't washed or brushed her hair when M'gann come along. She can't help but think about how dirty she must look.

But, M'gann doesn't seem to mind. Not at all.

Artemis likes when M'gann tells stories about herself and Conner. About how they made it work out, despite everything that had happened.

Artemis likes happy endings. She likes them a lot.

She doesn't like when M'gann mentions Wally, though. Or when she tries to tell her that he wouldn't want her to be "like this", or that he's "looking down on her".

Her story with Wally is not a happy ending.

So, really, it's not a story at all.


	4. Chapter 4

Artemis yells at Dick. A lot.

She yells at him for his lies, she yells at him for his secrets.

She yells at him because she doesn't feel like yelling at herself anymore.

It's really only when Dick breaks down crying and keeps on repeating that he's sorry, that it's all his fault, that Artemis stops yelling and starts crying too.

It's not Dick's fault. Not really. She doesn't know who's fault it is.

She doesn't know much of anything anymore.


	5. Chapter 5

Being Tigress is nice.

Artemis can forget about everything when she's chasing after bad guys, or shooting at them with a crossbow. She can live in the moment instead of in the past. She doesn't need to think about certain things she'd rather not think about.

It's only afterwards when the mask comes off and the end briefing is over that she remembers that cold, empty house she has to go back to. She remembers the unmade bed she has to sleep in.

She remembers everything.

' _He wanted me to tell you...he loved you.'_

 _How could you?_


	6. Chapter 6

Brucely whines. A lot.

He sits by the door or sits by the couch and just whines. He'll do it for hours. Artemis has a hard time getting him to go on walks. She has a hard time getting him to do _anything_ , actually.

The worst times is when he goes and sits by the fridge. Wally used to walk to the fridge and shove Brucely out of the way with his foot.

It's clear to Artemis what he is trying to do.

Usually when he does this, Artemis goes and sits in her room and thinks about everything for a long while. She remembers.

And she _really_ hates doing that…


	7. Chapter 7

Conner comes to visit once and only once.

They sit in complete silence for an hour and a half, and then Conner gets up and leaves. He says "See you soon", but they both know that it won't happen.

Oddly enough, Artemis finds the encounter comforting. She manages to enjoy and relish the silence without having her thoughts bubble up and ruin it all for her.

But when Conner's gone, everything shifts back to the way it usually does.

And Artemis is left with the shattered pieces of a broken memory.


	8. Chapter 8

There's one mission where they go off against Simon.

M'gann keeps him busy for the most part. Tigress is really just there as background support. She shoots at a couple of Queen Bee's minions, warns La'gaan about a few enemies behind him, and then kind of just disappears into the background.

She runs into Simon.

Simon, who forces his way into her mind beneath all the numbing pain and brings up memories. Memories of him. Memories of his face. Memories of his eyes. Memories of his lips and hair and smell and smile and-

And it's just too much. Artemis screams.


	9. Chapter 9

M'gann comes to visit her while she's recovering. She apologizes for not stopping Simon. She apologizes for not being there.

Artemis says nothing. She has nothing to say.


	10. Chapter 10

Kaldur is a great team leader.

You can tell he cares for the team. Can tell he enjoys being in there, fighting with all he has. He smiles sometimes, but not as much as he used to.

Artemis doesn't blame him. It's a similar story with her.

Kaldur seems unsure of himself sometimes. He questions himself a lot, and falls silent most of the time. It's as though his time with the Light has made him forget most of the qualities needed for leading an allegation.

Kaldur also frequently looks behind him. As though checking for something. Or _someone_.

Artemis doesn't blame him. She does as well.


	11. Chapter 11

Sometimes the younger Team members give her looks. Sad looks. Looks of pity, of understanding, of condolence, of sympathy.

Artemis hates when they do that. She doesn't like to be pitied. Their sympathy is unwanted.

The understanding looks are by far the worst. They don't understand.

They never will.


	12. Chapter 12

Artemis dreams of working with Kaldur undercover in the Light. She dreams of capturing M'gann or blowing up Mount Justice. She dreams of Simon and Black Manta and Tigress.

She dreams of running into Wally's arms after it all, and holding him like she's holding the world in her arms.

And then she wakes up. And it all disappears.


	13. Chapter 13

Zatanna takes her out for ice cream one day.

The two talk and laugh about the good old days, and remember how adorable Dick used to be and how innocent M'gann was. How socially awkward Conner could be, and about all the times they had managed to screw-up covert-ops.

It's nice. The most fun Artemis has had in awhile. There's no bringing up of Wally, and not even a word about Artemis's physical and mental state.

She sleeps over at Zatanna's that night.

For the first time in a long time, Artemis isn't plagued by nightmares.


	14. Chapter 14

Painting helps.

When she paints, Artemis can do as she likes. She can paint a happy family or a child laughing as their father held them. She can paint the moon and the sky and the stars.

She really likes painting cats. Purple-striped cats, to be specific.

And girls with blonde hair and blue eyes too big for the world.

She likes the way the brush strokes the paper softly, as though they were dancing with one another in a ballroom fit for kings.

She likes how when she paints, her other thoughts simply float away onto the paper as well as the different colored paints.

She likes that she doesn't have to think when she paints.


	15. Chapter 15

She doesn't know very much about Bart.

She only knows that he's the smiley speedster from the future, the one who now wears Wally's uniform. The one who seems too quiet for somebody who's supposed to be Kid Flash.

A lot of people worry about Bart and Artemis being together, so they aren't on many missions with one another. They think that Bart reminds Artemis too much of Wally. But, it's not true. Bart is nothing like him. Even in the Kid Flash outfit, there's nothing about him that compares to Wally in the slightest.

And there's one reason to contribute this to, really.

Bart never _smiles_.


	16. Chapter 16

There's this one mission where Artemis is hit in the head really hard by some jerk with a machine gun. When she wakes up, she sees a blur of yellow and red staring down at her.

She knows instantly that it's not really him, but doesn't bring herself to care.

She holds on to Bart for a long time. The looks of pity around her amplify tenfold.


	17. Chapter 17

M'gann visits again.

This time, she yells at Artemis. Yells and cries about how worried she is and how Artemis is wasting her life away. Brucely whines to accompany her.

Artemis doesn't cry, though. Something she prides herself on.

Instead, she yells back. And they go on like this for some while, simply yelling and screaming at each other for what seems like forever until M'gann finally screams something in her native language and falls silent.

M'gann leaves after that, and Brucely falls asleep on the couch. Artemis takes a second to look around her and realizes just how much of a mess it all is. How much of a mess _she_ is.

She still doesn't cry. She finds that she can't anymore.


	18. Chapter 18

At university, Artemis is silent. She doesn't talk to many people, and when she does it's only because she's spoken to. She used to have friends. They have slowly drifted away.

One of her professors asks her how she's coping. Artemis doesn't know how to answer.


	19. Chapter 19

Dick is getting more and more on her nerves. It seems that every moment he is there and criticizing Artemis or Bart for something. Other members of the team as well, but mostly them.

It gets hard to hold her tongue when she really feels like screaming out at Dick. Lashing out. She feels violent inside. Her heart hammers in it's chest, and she wants to punch something.

Punch _someone_.

She decides to talk to Black Canary about it.


	20. Chapter 20

Black Canary has been there with them since his passing.

Artemis goes for many sessions with her, and finds her attitude to be quite helpful and charming.

Dick doesn't. She knows this, because he's been there too. So has Bart. He finds her annoying, and bares his teeth and curses mercilessly when asked personal questions.

She doesn't know what Bart thinks. He's quiet. Always quiet.

They're the three who have been affected the most. The ones who have the most trouble coping with the situation at hand.

Except, Artemis doesn't really want to cope.

Maybe that's the whole entire problem…


	21. Chapter 21

Before the fight with M'gann when she storms out, she mentions that perhaps Artemis should write a book of grievances, and then sell it so that it may help others going through a similar situation to hers.

Artemis seriously doubts anyone else has lost their boyfriend who has superspeed to an alien race attempting to conquer the earth by blowing it to bits.

M'gann says that Artemis thinks too narrowly about things.

Artemis agrees full heartedly.


	22. Chapter 22

That was the last good visit Artemis has with M'gann. After the fight, she doesn't come back again.


	23. Chapter 23

Before the looks of pity and the tears in the night, there is Black Canary, Artemis, Bart, Dick and a small, claustrophobic room.

Dick glares at Black Canary, Artemis glares at the floor, and Bart glares at nothing.

She tells them that they're going to keep a "journal" of sorts, a book where they are going to write their thoughts and feelings out. Artemis thinks it's stupid, and Dick laughs pathetically.

Black Canary says that the only thing they're not allowed to do it write in first person. This catches Artemis's attention. She never quite liked the "I's" in books anyways.

She says it's to give them a different perspective of what they are thinking. To be able to look at it through another person's mind instead of their own.

Dick laughs again, but Artemis is interested.


	24. Chapter 24

She opens the book and stares at the blank page for a long time.

Then she picks up the pencil. Picks it up and writes:

" _ARTEMIS'S STATE OF MIND"_


	25. Chapter 25

Dick yells at her right in front of the entire Team one day. Artemis is so taken aback, she doesn't even say anything in response. She makes a mistake during a mission. A small one. A forgettable one.

But Dick acts like it's the biggest fucking thing on the planet.

Artemis is angry and sad and confused.

" _We'll laugh about this someday..._ " she thinks, " _We'll laugh_."


	26. Chapter 26

Artemis fails a lot of things at university now. She used to be a top student. She no longer is. Her professors are concerned that at this rate, she'll fail the semester.

Her friends don't talk to her anymore. They have all moved on now. So have Wally's. It's like everybody has forgotten he even existed. It's like speaking his name will reveal some huge curse.

It's stupid.

Nobody on the Team mentions him either. They're all back to normal. M'gann is smiley and laughs at all of Conner's jokes, though she still avoids any contact with Artemis. The others also seem to have forgotten.

Seeing Garfield smile is nice, but she can't help but want to scream out that Wally is _dead_. She knows that's not fair, that they have to move on, but she hasn't moved on…

So why should they?


	27. Chapter 27

Dick hits Bart.

It's before a mission, and he's not paying attention. Maybe lost in thought. He's staring straight through Dick's head. Frankly, Artemis isn't paying attention either, but at least she's being discreet about it.

Dick stops talking about the "Stop Amazo From Wreaking Havoc" mission and walks up to Bart. Bart simply continues to stare through him.

Dick slaps him.

There are gasps and yelps. Everybody seems shocked. But nobody says anything in Bart's defense.

Nobody but Artemis.

She yells at Dick, and he yells back. Then she grabs the small boy by the arm and practically drags him out from the Watchtower.

She doesn't realize there are tears streaming down her face until they fall and hit his auburn hair.


	28. Chapter 28

"I'm sorry he did that to you." Artemis says when they are back in the safety of her-not _their_ , she's gotten used to saying _her_ -home.

Bart says nothing.

He's quiet. Always quiet.


	29. Chapter 29

Batman and Dick fight a lot more now.

They had been pretty bad before, but now they do it in front of the Team as well. The League isn't happy about Dick hitting Bart. Nobody is.

They are happy that Artemis spoke up and said something against him. Black Canary praises her on her bravery.

Artemis doesn't know what to think. She doesn't feel very brave…


	30. Chapter 30

Wally comes to visit her in a dream one night.

"Hey babe. You miss me?" he asks, and his red headed, big-mouthed self has never looked more beautiful. Artemis hugs him tightly.

They spend the day doing everything they had ever wanted to to. They go to Paris, like he promised. They have picnics, and tag-team villains on missions.

Artemis whispers "I miss you."

He responds "I know."

When she wakes up, she grabs at nothing in the darkness for awhile. Brucely howls and Artemis screams at him to shut up.

She can't think with all this _noise_.


	31. Chapter 31

Black Canary says the dream was Artemis's way of "letting go".

Artemis doesn't want to let go.


	32. Chapter 32

Artemis is very aware that her book is sad.

Sometimes, she flips through the pages and looks back on all the hard times she's had. All the good and the bad.

Sometimes, she doesn't feel like writing anymore.

She doesn't feel like writing about herself in the third person anymore.

 _(I_ don't _feel like writing about myself in the_ third person _anymore, you_ hear _me?)_

And then there are times like these where she picks up the pencil, and keeps on writing anyways.

Sometimes she wonders what Bart and Dick write about in their books.

Do they even write? Or, is Artemis the only one taking this seriously?

She feels nervous when she thinks about that.


	33. Chapter 33

She sees Bart writing in his book one day. When Cassie tries to get a better look, he slams it shut.

She doesn't know why, but she feels better after seeing that.


	34. Chapter 34

Another thing she likes is looking after her niece, Lian.

It makes her feel happy inside to know that her sister has a life now. That she's managed through her own struggles in life. It gives her strength that she'll be able to get through her own.

Of course, Jade is still a fighter. And, she can't always risk having Lian with her.

Lian is a child who is the embodiment of happiness. Artemis loves making her laugh. She loves when Brucely plays with her. She loves when they all sit down to watch some crappy movie from the 80's and Lian and Brucely both fall asleep on her lap.

She especially loves it when Jade stays over with them.

She wonders whether Jade is only being nice to her because of everything that's been happening with Wally.

She decides that she doesn't care.


	35. Chapter 35

"How are you Artemis?"

 _Do you miss him?_

"I'm alright."

 _I'm dying inside_

"That's good to hear."

 _I don't believe you_

"Yeah."

 _Please help_


	36. Chapter 36

Music is nice. So is writing. And painting. And looking after Lian.

But, they're only distractions.

And distractions don't last forever.


	37. Chapter 37

Artemis realizes that her last few entries have been quite sad.

She's sorry.


	38. Chapter 38

Black Canary says that Artemis should start taking a medication with a name that's too long for her to remember. She thanks her and takes the pill bottle home.

She empties them all into the trash.

She's not sick. She doesn't need them.


	39. Chapter 39

Dick is on her last nerve.

It seems that every moment they are fighting. Yelling. Screaming at each other for reasons that are so stupid, she hasn't bothered to remember them.

It bothers the other members of the Team, that much she knows. They avoid her. They avoid Dick as well.

Her throat hurts from screaming a lot. Her voice sounds raspy when she talks.

That's okay. She doesn't talk much anymore anyways.


	40. Chapter 40

One night, she and Dick fight for so long and scream so hard, that their voices echo throughout the Watchtower.

"I'll leave if you want me to." Dick growls.

" _Get out_." Artemis hisses.

Sad blue eyes stare at her for about a minute. And then Dick gets up and simply walks away.


	41. Chapter 41

Dick doesn't return after about a week. Nobody knows where he went. They only know that he and Artemis fought and that he stormed out. She can tell they're all anxious, especially Bruce.

People have ask Artemis to tell them more about the fight so that they can attempt to find out where he is. Artemis refuses to say anything.

Infact, if he never returns, then good riddance. She hates him. She wants him gone. Now that he is, life will be _so_ much easier!

Right?


	42. Chapter 42

Dick still isn't back.

Artemis begins to worry.


	43. Chapter 43

She dreams of the fight over and over again. Guilt plagues not only her every waking thought, but her dreams as well.

She dreams of angry cries and raw emotions. She dreams of anger and hatred. She dreams of "I'll leave if you want me to" and "Get out."

She wishes she could take it all back.

Most of all, she dreams of sad blue eyes staring at her. Sad blue eyes and a haunted laugh of the ghost of a child she once knew.

The reason she wakes up screaming is because of those sad blue eyes.

And she wishes she could take it _all_ back.


	44. Chapter 44

It's been over two months.

Dick's still not back.


	45. Chapter 45

" _We'll laugh about this someday."_

Four months.

 _Please_ , Dick...come back...


	46. Chapter 46

He's not coming back, is he?


	47. Chapter 47

They fall into complete silence when Kaldur begins to explain what they will do on their next mission. Not Nightwing. Not Dick. _Kaldur_.

She can tell that Kaldur is just as worried and off put by Dick's disappearance. Though, oddly enough, everybody seems to think that it's Artemis who's taking this the hardest. They think it's Artemis who's having the most trouble.

They think Artemis is really, _really_ sick.

And she's not. She just doesn't know how to tell them this.


	48. Chapter 48

"Are you taking your medication?"

"Yes."

Everybody lies sometimes.


	49. Chapter 49

She wakes up one early morning to find Bart passed out on her couch.

She doesn't kick him out. She doesn't yell and scream at him like so many have done to her. She simply stares at him for a while.

And then she drapes a blanket over him.


	50. Chapter 50

Waking up to find Bart on her couch becomes a regular occurrence.

Artemis doesn't know whether this is a good thing or a bad.


	51. Chapter 51

One night, Brucely's howls become to much. Artemis covers her ears and screams.

The next morning, she takes him to an Adoption Center.

Sitting in her car, book in hand, Artemis doesn't know what else to write about.


	52. Chapter 52

The house is quieter without Brucely. She regrets giving him up.


	53. Chapter 53

It's the dream that draws the line for her.

A dream where all her friends and family are crying and angrily yelling at her to get back up in her feet. They cry that they're disappointed, that they can't believe the monster that she's become.

Artemis just sits unmoving on the floor.

And then, sad blue eyes in the distance. That haunted, childish laughter.

And then nothing. She wakes up.

She _needs_ to find Dick. No matter what.


	54. Chapter 54

Artemis has an idea.


	55. Chapter 55

In the middle of the night, Artemis packs up her things. She wears a white shirt, brown baggy hoodie, and ripped blue jeans along with a pair of worn out shoes. For the first time in a long time, she showers and brushes her blonde mop of tangles.

She packs a bag full of supplies. Preservable food. Bottled water. A match box. Some money. I.D papers and her passport. Her wallet. Her phone and phone charger. A flashlight. Batteries. A First Aid Kit. Her keys. Extra clothes. A blanket she stuffs up and barely manages to fit in. Toiletries. A pocket knife.

She needs to find Dick. So, she'll go out and find him.

Wherever he's gone, she'll find him. Follow in his footsteps. Trace his steps. He may be the detective, but Artemis _will_ find him.

Even if it means leaving behind everything she's ever known.


	56. Chapter 56

Something stops her before she can exit the back door.

Something, or _someone_.

Green eyes stare into her own grey, and Artemis can't help but realize just how empty they seem. Bart stands in the middle of the hall. His blanket lays abandoned on the floor.

Something passes through that eye contact. Something that Artemis isn't used to. And, she suddenly realizes what he wants.

She sighs.

"Pack a bag."


	57. Chapter 57

He can't be in Blüdhaven.

No, Artemis thinks, that would be too easy. Dick is smart. He knows that they would look there. Hell, Batman probably already looked there for him.

The problem is that Artemis doesn't know where to look for him next.

She decides to go to Blüdhaven anyways. Maybe they'll get lucky.


	58. Chapter 58

Bart trails behind her like a shadow in the night. He's quiet. Always quiet.

She doesn't know much about Bart, but wants to know more.

His silence kills her.

The thing about him that scares him the most is neither the shadow aspect or the silence. _Or_ the fact that he constantly mumbles to himself under his breath.

It's his green eyes that hold no emotion whatsoever.

Ones that are so alike, yet so different, to Wally's.


	59. Chapter 59

She finds out where Dick lives from some of his co-workers at this old job he apparently used to have as a cop, or something. They say he quit a few weeks before he disappeared.

Artemis's throat tightens when she realizes that he's been planning this out for a while now.

When she and Bart arrive at his apartment, it's as sad and empty as Bart's eyes. There are papers strewn about the floor and empty beer cans littered around as well.

Artemis picks up one of the papers, and her eyes widen as it details a very thorough explanation as to why Wally can't be dead and is really still alive.

She picks up another. And another.

They all entail the same thing. Whether it be time travel, universe hopping, the "Speedforce" (that last one she doesn't know about), or so many more, they all say that Wally's alive. That he can be saved.

Was this was Dick's way of coping?

Artemis suddenly feels very sad.


	60. Chapter 60

Bart calls out to her. A low and steady sound.

She walks over to him and finds that he is pointing towards a paper. One with a clear list on it. A step-by-step list.

Problem. It's all written in Romanian.


	61. Chapter 61

They manage to find a library.

Artemis sits down by the computer and searches the bowels of the Internet for a translator that is better than the crap one Google has. She doesn't want to mess this up. She charges her phone at the same time.

Bart veers away and stares at the many shelves of books almost thoughtfully. His fingers brush across them with a tenderness she wasn't aware he had. She stops her frantic searching and takes a minute to walk towards him.

His hands rests on one of the books.

"You want to read?" Artemis whispers, because it is a library, and she doesn't want to be caught or kicked out anytime soon. Bart blinks, his eyes never leaving the book.

"I don't know how." he responds.

Artemis says nothing after that. She returns to the computer.


	62. Chapter 62

Artemis receives a text from Zatanna:

 _Text received from: ZeeBBY_

 _5:45 PM_

 _Artemis, where are you_

 _Text received from: ZeeBBY_

 _5:47 PM_

 _You haven't come 2 the Watch. in 5+ days_

 _Text received from: ZeeBBY_

 _6:27 PM_

 _Artemis_?


	63. Chapter 63

They don't have a place to stay, so they sleep outside near the library. Artemis manages to translate more than a quarter of the list, though most if it is still code that she can't understand. She understands some of it, though.

Dick is trying to do... _something_. Trying to _prove_ something. To her and Bart. To the Team.

Bart's head falls as he lays curled up on the concrete below them. Artemis's own eyes begin to droop, and she allows herself to fall asleep after a minute or so.

' _Stay whelmed, Arty. Stay_ whelmed _.'_


	64. Chapter 64

One thing is clear, Dick isn't in Blüdhaven. Artemis and Bart have managed to scavenge most of the city, and there's been no sign of Dick.

Artemis translates " _I can't stay in this fucking place anymore_ " from the list. It's one of the steps. She knows at that moment he's not there. He can't be.

So then, where is he?


	65. Chapter 65

The list reveals that Dick plans to go to Mexico City.

Artemis needs to get there.


	66. Chapter 66

They rent a car.

Their quest is a road trip now, apparently.


	67. Chapter 67

A memory:

She hasn't gone on a road trip since she was a child. All her father and mother do on this trip is fight. They yell and yell and _yell._

Jade's there, too. Her teenage self, at the time, is only focused on leaving her headphones in playing at full blast. Artemis carelessly plays with her dolls.

Until the one day they stop for a picnic.

They're outside in some park, with green leaves and the most beautiful flowers Artemis has ever seen. And, her parents are going at it again, and Jade ignores everything once more.

Artemis can't help it. She bursts into tears.

They all stop what they are doing and turn to her, eyes widened slightly. The crying, six year old finally receives the attention she's been selfishly dreaming of.

There's complete silence. And then;

Jade removes the earbuds and comes to sit next to Artemis. She grabs the doll that looks like her and looks over it sadly.

"My name's Jade. What's your name?" Jade makes the doll ask. Artemis sniffles.

"Artemis." she whispers.

Her parents watch on silently as the two play.

They don't fight for the rest of the day…


	68. Chapter 68

She expects Bart to be restless and unbearable during the rest of the trip, like Wally used to be when he was confined to one spot for too long. But, he's the complete opposite. He sits silently, staring at his knees in the passenger seat.

Artemis focuses on the map, on driving, on how much gas they have left. Anything and everything but Bart. But, she finds that it becomes successively more difficult to ignore the thirteen year old in the seat opposite of hers.

So, she turns on the radio.

Bart perks up, and a hint of a smile falls over Artemis's face. She begins humming the tune to the song and Bart's head begins to bob up and down, side to side.

And before they know it, they're both belting out the lyrics to some old pop song that they don't even know the name of.


	69. Chapter 69

_Text received from: ZeeBBY_

 _11:56 PM_

 _Artemis, please answer_

 _Text received from: ZeeBBY_

 _2:47 AM_

 _ARTEMIS_

 _Text received from: ZeeBBY_

 _3:38 AM_

 _Please...come back…_


	70. Chapter 70

Artemis receives a call from Black Canary whilst Bart is sleeping.

She decides to pick it up.


	71. Chapter 71

" _Hello_?"

"Artemis?"

"..."

"Artemis!"

"Yeah. It's me."

"Artemis... _where are you?"_

"I-I can't tell you."

" _Artemis_! This is _not_ up for debate! I need you to tell me-"

"I'm doing something I have to!"

"What?"

"I'm going to find Dick."

"...Artemis...Dick has been missing for more than half a year now. He's not coming back-"

"I know! That's why i'm going to go find him!"

"Artemis, please. We're all so worried about you…"

"Ha! Yeah right!"

"The Team's been in _mourning_. Do you know what you've done to them?"

"..."

"We're worried _sick_ , Artemis."

" _Dinah_. You're not guilting me out of this. I have to find Dick."

"Artemis, _please_. Have you been taking your medication-?"

"I don't care about the damned medication!"

"..."

"You can shove up your ass, thank you!"

"Fine. You want to play it that way? Bart's there with you, right?"

"N-no…"

"There's no point in denying it Artemis. We're not stupid."

"Fine, yes! So what?"

"I'll inform you that what you're doing is illegal."

"I'm allowed to go wherever I want, thank you! I'm a legal adult!"

"Of course. But Bart isn't. And, since he is considered to be a minor by law, and you are not his legal guardian, what you are doing is called "abduction by a third person" and warrants _jail time._ "

"..."

"You've basically kidnapped him Artemis. This is serious. _Really_ serious."

"That's bullshit!"

"Not to the law, it's not."

"The kid's from the future! He probably doesn't even have a real I.D.!"

"Making what you're doing even _more_ dangerous and unnecessary."

"..."

"Artemis. Come back. Come back to us."

"No...I can't..."

"You're _sick,_ Artemis. You need help-"

" _Fuck you."_


	72. Chapter 72

Artemis doesn't tell Bart about the phone call.

What he doesn't know won't hurt him...


	73. Chapter 73

"Hey, can you help with directions?" Artemis asks Bart as they're driving into a city full of confusion twists and turns. She doesn't wait for his confirmation before passing him the map. Usually, Artemis uses her phone, but now that it can run out of battery at anytime, she doesn't risk it.

Bart stares silently at the map for about a minute, and then Artemis asks what's wrong.

"It's as simple as reading off the directions" she says.

"I can't." he mutters.

Artemis falls silent, and remembers what Bart had said back at the library.

" _I don't know how."_

"That's okay." she responds.

He stays silent. He probably doesn't know what to say.

Neither does she.


	74. Chapter 74

It's the middle of the night when Artemis awakes to truly realize that they're going to be crossing the border between America and Mexico, and Bart doesn't have any I.D or a passport on him.

 _Shit_.


	75. Chapter 75

Artemis is charging her phone at some restaurant she manages to find that allows you to do that when a woman who can be no older than twenty walks up to her. She's in the middle of chewing on a balogna sandwich, and has to put it down and clear her throat at the sudden interruption.

"Can I help you?" she asks, annoyed. The woman stares at her for about a minute, before she clicks her tongue and grabs out her own phone.

"I couldn't help notice the similarities. Is this you?"

The blood drains from her face as the unknown woman holds up a picture of both she and Bart. She doesn't recognize Bart's picture, but her own is one taken a long time ago. It's from the day they all went to the beach. That time, Wally hadn't been stuck in school, and Artemis had thought it to be stupid to even go in the first place. That was, at least, until Dick had soaked Wally in water. Artemis had thrown back her head and laughed, and M'gann had snapped a picture.

Wally had sarcastically noted "It's probably one of the only pictures you'll _ever_ see her happy in."

She had proceeded to tackle him mercilessly to the ground.

It seems like such a long time ago to Artemis now…

The thing that worries her about the picture is the fact that in big, bold letters it reads "MISSING PERSONNEL", and there is contact information at the top of the page in case they are found.

They...set a "missing person's" notification on her?

 _Really_?

"Nope. Sorry. You've got the wrong girl." Artemis replies cooly. The lady's eyes move suspiciously to Bart. She looks him over for about a moment, and he stares at the ground, unmoving.

Artemis bites her lip. Her heart feels like it's beating at a million miles per hour.

It probably is…

"No. No, I think I have the _right_ girl, actually." she mutters, and Artemis narrows her eyes significantly.

Then the lady calls the number on the notification.

"Time to go!" Artemis hisses. She grabs Bart's arm and hauls him up and out of there as quickly as she can. There are murmurs and looks sent in their direction, and Artemis feels the need to get out of there even quicker.

This was _not_ the way this was supposed to go…


	76. Chapter 76

It's only when they've driven miles away from the place that Artemis realizes she's left her phone behind.


	77. Chapter 77

With no way of accessing the Internet anymore, Artemis has to figure things out on her own. Of course, that phone call won't help much at all. Infact, it gives the Team a hint to their location. And, despite the fact that she writes most of everything in this book, Artemis has some notes taken down in there as well. So, that isn't very good either.

She apologizes for grabbing Bart so harshly back at the restaurant. He says that it's okay. That he neither blames nor harbors any resentment towards her for it.

She's glad that Bart is so forgiving. She reminds herself to be like that in the future as well.


	78. Chapter 78

Bart's apparently never had a hamburger.

Artemis is in a state of shock when she hears this news.

"What do you _mean_ you've never had a burger!? You're a _speedster_!" she exclaims.

Bart shrugs.

"They weren't really that big a thing...back in my timeline."

Artemis gets more and more of the feeling that Bart's timeline isn't a very happy place…


	79. Chapter 79

Bart loves the hamburger.

She figured that he would.

It was Wally's favorite too.


	80. Chapter 80

Bart wakes up screaming one night, which kind of shocks Artemis. He's usually so silent, and this new noise coming from him is completely _alien_.

(How _appropriate…_ )

He doesn't cry, but he clutches onto her shirt, and she feels him shaking in her arms as she hugs him tightly and whispers gently in his ear that everything's going to be okay, even though she doesn't even know that for sure.

She asks him what the dream is about.

He says something about something or other being moded.

Sometimes, Artemis wishes she can understand others a bit better.


	81. Chapter 81

Apparently, mode means bad and crash means good. Retro means old.

Bart says it's future slang.

Artemis struggles to understand.


	82. Chapter 82

A few nights later, Bart returns the favor when Artemis wakes up screaming bloody murder. She has another dream about Dick, and those sad blue eyes. Wally's there too. He and Dick scream inconsistent words that make no sense and may as well be gibberish.

Artemis keeps screaming that she can't understand.

Then, Wally takes out a gun and shoots her.

She tells him about the dream, and Bart hugs her tightly and the two stay like that for awhile until Artemis eventually falls back asleep.


	83. Chapter 83

She wakes up the next morning with Bart's head on her chest. It reminds her of when she and Wally used to wake up like that after long nights of studying. He'd always say that her chest was the most comforting pillow in the world; her heartbeat, a lullabye.

She would snort and call him a dork. He would say that it was poetry, and he was an artist.

Like Artemis used to do with Wally, she leans down and plants a kiss on his forehead. Bart stirs, but doesn't awaken.

It's one of the few times where thinking of Wally doesn't bring up bad memories.


	84. Chapter 84

Artemis reaches and crosses the border without much problem. From what she's heard, it's harder to get back in than out. Of course, they ask questions, and Artemis responds that she's going to see a cousin for a few days. That her grandmother has recently died and that she's going for the funeral.

She manages to get out with minor complications.

She just hopes that everything's alright on Bart's end of things.


	85. Chapter 85

Because Bart had no identification, and Artemis doesn't want to risk it, she tells him to sneak around the bend without getting caught.

Yes, it's illegal. But, the kid has super speed.

And they're superheroes.

She figures it doesn't really matter at this point.

He manages to run it safely, and meets up with her at their agreed rendezvous point. As he enters the car, Artemis apologizes for not being able to drive him there. That she's simply worries it would catch unwanted attention from authorities.

Bart says that it's fine. He doesn't look fine, though.

She starts the car, turns on the radio, and takes off.

She hopes to leave not only that border behind, but all her doubts and worries about what she's doing.


	86. Chapter 86

"You loved him."

It's a statement, not a question. Artemis looks up from the map and Bart peers at her curiously. She blinks, and brushes some hair from her eyes.

"Wally?" she asks.

"Who else?" he says in a monotone.

Artemis blinks. Her eyebrows scrunch up tightly, and she balls her hands into fists.

Why is he asking this? Why now?

"Of course." she replies honestly. It is the truth, after all. She loved Wally. Loved him so much. More than anybody could ever comprehend. More than _Bart_ could ever comprehend. That may not be very fair to say, but Artemis doesn't care.

 _She doesn't care._

"I loved him a lot." she reinforces the statement. Honestly, whenever she thinks about him it's hard to contain herself. Which is why she avoids it most of the time.

"Huh." Bart mumbles, "Already using the past tense."

Artemis's breath hitches, and her eyes widen to the size of saucers. Because, _holy shit_ , she _did_ use the past tense. She hadn't even _thought_ about it. It had just _happened_.

Like she _had_ loved Wally. Like she had _stopped_.

"I-It's not like that." she breathes, and she feels a sickening feeling build in the pit of her stomach.

"Yeah." Bart says, and he averts his eyes out the window.

Artemis wants to throw up. So, she does.

She pulls over the car, exits, and pukes all over the grassy terrain by the side of the road.

She retches any semblance of ever not loving him out of her system.


	87. Chapter 87

Artemis feels as though she's let Wally down.

For that, she's sorry.


	88. Chapter 88

A memory:

She worries when Wally doesn't come home seven hours after a mission. Nobody's heard from him. Nobody knows where he is. When he finally arrives, she yells and screams and storms off angrily. Wally manages to coax her out of her room and she breathes heavily into his shoulder while she holds him tightly.

"I thought you were dead." she repeats again and again, and he holds her even more tightly than she holds him.

"Babe." he whispers hoarsely, "I'm not going anywhere. I would never leave you."

She looks up at him. "Promise?"

He nods, and his greens eyes shine as he stares down at her.

" _Promise_."


	89. Chapter 89

She was stupid to believe him in the first place.

Stupid, stupid, stupid.


	90. Chapter 90

There's still quite a ways to go to Mexico City.

Artemis wonders how long she will last in this car with memories of him that threaten to bubble over.

She hopes she won't break down in front of Bart.

That's the last thing they need.


	91. Chapter 91

She wakes up another night and finds Bart outside on the top of the car. He stares at the stars as though they are the most beautiful thing in the world.

"You okay?" she asks, and sits by him. He blinks and turns to look at her. For the first time probably ever, she sees something in his eyes other then that dead look. It's so shocking she actually gasps and her eyes widen. Bart blinks once more.

"What?" he asks.

"Y-your eyes. They look different." she proclaims stupidly, and only after realizes how dumb that must sound.

But Bart laughs, and a smile appears on his face. Artemis is once again taken completely aback.

"Yeah. I guess so. In a good way or a bad way, though?"

"Good way. Definitely good." she blurts out. His smile fades, and he turns to stare back up to stare at the stars. A look of remembrance fills his expression.

"Yeah. I figured."

Artemis turns to look at the stars as well. At least out of everything that has changed, they're still perched up there as they always were.


	92. Chapter 92

The next morning, Bart is back to that unfeeling, emotionless expression of his.

She misses his smile.


	93. Chapter 93

Her dreams are oddly Wally-free.

It feels nice to not have to think of him every time she closes her eyes. To not be riddled with guilt every time she turns to look over her shoulder because she thinks she sees or hears him. She doesn't have to pretend that she doesn't have nightmares every night.

On the one hand, she gets the best night sleeps she's had in a long time.

On the other, she misses it. In her eyes, this means she's letting go. She's accepting it. She's stopped blaming herself and stopped thinking of him.

Artemis doesn't want to let go. Because, if she does, then she's afraid of what will happen next.


	94. Chapter 94

Some guy hits on her.

They stop for lunch, and Artemis is waiting for Bart to come out of the restroom when some guy with long, black hair walks up and asks for her number.

She politely declines, but he doesn't quit. She tries moving spots, but he and his friends follow her wherever she goes. They're a bit older than her. Maybe Kaldur's age.

They're also assholes.

Bart comes out of the bathroom and eyes them suspiciously. He walks over to Artemis, that same look from that one night when they were looking at the stars present on his facial features.

"Everything okay here?" he asks, and the guys around her size him up and laugh. Artemis's eyes narrow and she leans forward and slaps the guy in the face.

He punches her. Bart shoves him to the floor.

A fight breaks out. And, punching at enemies all the while knowing her teammate has her back reminds her of old times. Of good times.

She feels good.

After all, she's doing what she does best.

Kicking ass.


	95. Chapter 95

"You didn't have to push him, you know." Artemis says as she wraps a bandage over his arm. He winces, and shuffles slightly.

"You didn't have to slap him." he returns.

Artemis feels at her cheek. There's already a bruise forming, she can tell. It's okay, though. It won't be the first or last one she receives.

"I guess we both felt protective of one another, huh?" she smiles.

Bart smiles back, and it's something so beautiful and incredible, she knows she'll never forget it as long as she lives.

"Yeah." he responds, " I guess."


	96. Chapter 96

It's in the middle of nowhere, and the moon is high in the sky when Artemis stops the car. Bart looks over at her.

"Hey. I know it's kind of early, but i'm tired. Can we stop for the night? We'll pick back up tomorrow." she says, and Bart does his blinking thing before turning to stare out the window.

"Yeah. Sure."

She turns away from him and stares out her own window for a little while. The stars are pretty, at least.

' _Goodnight Wally_.' she thinks, and she shuts her eyes and tries to fall asleep.


	97. Chapter 97

Shit.


	98. Chapter 98

They've found her.

" _POLICE! COME OUT FROM THE VEHICLE WITH YOUR HANDS UP_!" they yell, and Artemis peaks out the window to not only see many officers clad in uniforms, but members of the Justice League as well.

Her breath hitches in her throat.

No, no, no. This was _not_ the way this was supposed to go!

" _THIS IS YOUR FINAL WARNING. COME OUT OR-"_

What to do? What to _do_?

What would _Wally_ do?


	99. Chapter 99

Wally would run.


	100. Chapter 100

Artemis takes off running.

She runs faster than she ever has in her life. So fast, that even Wally would be proud of her. He cheers for her at the back of her mind.

She hears people yelling for her to stop. But, she's not stopping. She can't. It's not even about Dick or Bart or herself anymore. It's not about proving anything to anyone. It's not about stars or scars or nightmares.

It's about Wally. Her and Wally and this _damned_ road.

Not just about the road she's currently running down, but metaphorically as well.

It's like they had been driving a car. And, there had been this terrible accident. This terrible accident that had driven her off the road, and now she was lost.

Heading down this entirely different road that she shouldn't be headed down.

But, Wally was her map. And, she's always been terrible at directions. She's terribly lost, and doesn't know which path to follow.

She thought that if she followed Dick, he'd know which way to go. That he'd find a way off the crossroads, but now she realizes that he just drove her farther from her wanted destination. So, now she's even more lost, and has a tourist with her to make matters worse.

And, when you're lost for so long, there's only so many ways you can be found…

But now, despite the yelling, she finds peace and silence in the cool air. She can hear her breath and feel her heart desperately clammer at her chest. She closes her eyes and sees an angel with a smile like summer and a voice like raindrops.

Wally is there. And, the cheering in the back of her head come to a sudden halt and she stops in her tracks as she realizes something. Something she should have realized a long time ago.

Wally wouldn't want her doing this!

Wally wouldn't want her to cave in on herself, and cry herself to sleep. He wouldn't have wanted her to drive Dick away in the first place, let alone kidnap Bart and go after him. He wouldn't have wanted her to fight with those guys or sleep on that street corner or give away Brucely.

He wouldn't have wanted any of that.

He would have just wanted her to let go…

He wouldn't have wanted her to run. He would have wanted her to stop.

So, she does.

She does, and allows herself to give up. To be taken away by these men. By the Justice League. She lets them tackle her to the floor, and harshly restrain her. She hears radio static and sirens and voices telling her that it's fine. That she's going to be okay.

In all the noise and chaos, she thinks of Wally.

She screams.

For the first time in a long time, she completely lets herself go. She yells and cries and wails. She screams so loud that she hopes it reaches him, wherever the hell he is.

She screams and thinks ' _Babe, this one's for you_.'

She screams and cries until her voice is raw and her cheeks are drowning in tears. She screams and cries until black dots begin to swallow up her vision.

She screams and cries until sticky eyes close in on themselves and blackness swirls in her mind heavily.

And, with one final tear, she says one final goodbye to the love of her life.


	101. Chapter 101

When she wakes up, it's in a brightly lit hospital room of all places. She gasps and shoots up from the bed, and becomes aware of the constant beeping by her side. A heart monitor. It takes her a while longer than she'd like to admit to remember everything that happened.

The car. The police. The Justice League. The screaming and crying. Her head feels funny. She thinks that they must have put her on some sort of drugs.

"Artemis!" somebody exclaims, and somebody hugs her tightly before she can even correctly process it. That one soon turns to two, and she realizes who they are.

"Mom. Jade." she whispers hoarsely, and wraps her arms around them tightly.

"Yes, baby. Yes. It's us." her mom whispers, and they separate for about a second and she sees the complete relief in her mother's eyes. The hint of a tear sneaks its way down it's cheek, and she hugs Artemis to her once more.

"You're okay now, baby. You're okay."

She lets out a sob

" _You're okay."_


	102. Chapter 102

" _Artemis_!"

It seems she's hearing that name more and more often nowadays. M'gann comes running at her. She almost topples over when the martian girl all but crashes into her. She hugs her tightly and cries into her shoulder.

Conner comes up running behind her. He sees Artemis and something flashes in his eyes. Something she's never seen before.

Relief, maybe. Hope. Happiness.

Zatanna follows, and she follows M'gann in throwing her arms around Artemis's middle and breathing heavily into her other shoulder.

"You idiot…" she whispers hoarsely, and she shakes softly as she begins to cry into a thoroughly shocked Artemis.

Kaldur is last to arrive. He takes one look at Artemis and this huge smile takes over all his features. And, Artemis can't help but smile back.

The next words out of his mouth are so ironic, she can't help but let out a laugh that carries down the hallway.

"Welcome back."

And then she is all but tackled out of her wheelchair by pretty much the entirety of the newer members of the Team.


	103. Chapter 103

"Artemis."

"Hey Dinah." she says, and The Black Canary herself walks up and wraps her arms around the blonde carefully. Almost as though she'll break if she squeezes too hard.

Ollie's next, and he doesn't hesitate at all. There's never any holding back with him. Roy comes up and smiles knowingly at her.

"Hey." he says.

" _Hey_." she returns.

He smirks. "Well, glad you're back to babysit your niece." Ollie and Dinah whip around to Roy, eyes wide and mouths ajar.

" _What!?_ " they both exclaim at the same time, and Roy turns a ghastly pale as he realizes just what he's revealed to them.

Artemis throws her head back and laughs.

She's doing that a lot more often nowadays. And, as she stands in the Watchtower that looks over the world as a whole, she can't feel as though she's made it. She's on top.

Back on track. Back on the road.

She's _back_.


	104. Chapter 104

"We need you to tell us where Bart is, Artemis."

Her heart skips a beat as she looks up at Dinah and J'ohn in shock. Barry sits in a corner by the side of the room. He stares sadly at the floor. She feels slightly bad. She didn't know how much this would have affected them all. If she had known, she would have never done it.

But…

"W-what do you mean?" she questions worriedly, "You didn't find him?"

Dinah and J'ohn share a worried look. Bruce's eyes narrow in the distance, and M'gann puts a hand up to her mouth in shock. Barry lets out a shaky breath.

"Y-you didn't find him, did you?" she whispers, and her heart now hammers wildly in her chest. Dinah breaths and nods silently.

"So, you don't know where he is? Artemis, he's just a child. Look at Barry. If you're lying-"

Artemis's eyes widen considerably. "I'm not! I wouldn't lie about something like that!"

Silence fills the room.

Because, if Bart wasn't found in the car where they found Artemis…

...then where is he?


	105. Chapter 105

Artemis enjoys looking after Lian nowadays. She laughs as Jade and she take walks in the park with her. Roy has his life back on track now. He has a job and everything. Jade constantly brags to her about it. They're trying to get out of the "business".

Artemis is glad.

Jade's got her life back on track now, too. You can tell.

She enjoys these walks with her sister. More than ever. Especially when her mother comes along.

It's like they're one, big, happy family.

And Artemis loves that.


	106. Chapter 106

They're not mad at her.

It's a huge relief. When she walks in the ever-familiar door and faces them for the first time in months. They're not mad.

Rudy and Mary accept her back with open arms. Barry stares silently.

She tells them she's sorry. She tells them it's her fault. She reveals everything. About the trip and her idea to find Dick. She tells them about taking Bart along with her because she figured that it would be okay. It would be what Wally would want.

She tells Barry she's sorry. That it's her fault now that he's…

Barry smiles and shakes his head. His eyes are wrinkled and his smile sad and faded. He seems so much older...so much more different than the old Barry she used to know. That they all used to know.

"It's nobody's fault, Artemis. If this entire ordeal has taught me anything, it's that. Blaming somebody...it doesn't get us anywhere."

Artemis smiles over at him.

And, he's right, she realizes. All this time, she's been looking for someone to blame, when there's nobody to blame at all. Not even herself.

She's been feeling guilty for nothing.

Artemis finally feels that she can let the guilt go.


	107. Chapter 107

A dream. About him.

He smiles. "Hey babe."

She smiles and shakes her head. She turns and walks away. She doesn't spare him a second glance. She doesn't say a single word.

All that needs to be said has been said already.


	108. Chapter 108

She becomes aware of the fact that she will have dreams and memories of him for the rest of her life. That he'll always be there at the very back of her mind.

But, she's already said her goodbyes.

The memory of him won't haunt her anymore.


	109. Chapter 109

She sheds the Tigress alias and goes back to Artemis. She does it for her. Because _she_ wants it. She's beginning to think of herself more. Beginning to appreciate her life and her family and friends.

She's happier. She treats every mission like a golden star.

She tries her best, and feels at home with the Team.

With her family.


	110. Chapter 110

Artemis doesn't take medication, which Dinah isn't happy about. But, she is happy that Artemis still writes in her book. This book.

Dinah asks what she's going to do with it after she finishes it. Because, every book has an ending. It has to.

Artemis says she has no clue. That maybe she'll post it to some random site online.

They both laugh.


	111. Chapter 111

Unbeknownst to the Team and league, she receives a letter from Bart.

 _Artemis,_

 _I don't know when you'll be getting this, but I guess i'll write it anyways. The only reason I am writing it is because I don't want you to worry. You don't deserve to worry. Like, at all._

 _Not the point._

 _I hope you're doing well. I'm sorry you got caught when we were so close. It doesn't really matter where I was or how I didn't get caught. But, I didn't. I'm sorry. I guess._

 _I want to let you know that though I may not have expressed it very well, you really helped me. In more ways than one. You're a super crash person, and it's no wonder Wally loved you the way he did. Sorry if mentioning him is moded and stuff._

 _I'm not exactly the happiest of people. Or the most expressive. So, you making me laugh and smile and feel like that is something that I can never thank you enough for. I hope this letter can convey that at the very least._

 _You're probably wondering where I am. You're probably worried. To be honest, I don't really even know where I am. But, that doesn't matter. I wouldn't tell you anyways._

 _Artemis, your book is ending soon, if you get what I mean, Your journey's coming to an end. Mine's only just begun. Thank you for the help, but…_

 _I need to find Dick. No matter what,_

 _It isn't just a matter of finding him. It's about Wally too. And putting his spirit to rest. I need to find Dick so that Wally can forgive me. So that he can be at peace. And, dragging you along in the mess is something that he'd never want._

 _In that sense, i'm glad you got caught._

 _This will probably be the last you hear from me for a while. Until I find him, at least. Maybe forever._

 _You can show this to the League, but i'd rather you not. It's not in my hands anymore, though. If it puts weight on your shoulders, then don't hide it. Don't strain yourself any further. You deserve the best and only the best._

 _With that out of the way, please don't come and look for me. I don't want to be found. Not just yet. I need some time. I need to find myself._

 _And to do that, I need to find Dick._

 _Thanks for everything. You're like a sister to me. I'll miss you, I guess._

 _Tell Barry I say hi._

 _It was crash while it lasted. Don't look for me._

 _-Bart_


	112. Chapter 112

Artemis has never felt better in her life.

She goes on constant missions, hangs out with friends and family, and smiles so much her cheeks hurt most of the time.

It seems like everything has gone back to normal.

Though there are always problems popping up, and sometimes she has nightmares about Wally or his death, it doesn't matter. She's learnt that life is neither good nor bad. It's what you decide to make it.

And, Artemis is going to dedicate herself to making her life the best she _can_ make it. She's going to love herself, and not hold grudges. She's had enough sadness to last five lifetimes. She's going to change that. She's going to be _happy_.

Not because it's what Wally would want. Because it's what _she_ wants.

Bart's right. Her book, it's _over_. There's no further reason to write in it. She doesn't need to see through the eyes of a third person anymore, but her own. Her conscious is cleared.

Her journey is over. Her book is ending.

Still, she can't help but sometimes wonder about Bart and Dick. Because, they're still out there. They're still going strong. Where are they now? Are they safe? Have they found each other?

Their journeys are not over. Their books have only just begun.

And, she can't help but consider what they entail.

But, her story is over. And this is the last chapter. She's going to spend the rest of her life eating chinese takeout and watching horror movies with Zatanna on her couch. It doesn't matter. If it's what makes her happy, then it's what she'll do.

Though, she wonders what will happen to this book after everything. Will she hoard it in her closet, never to be seen again? Or will she burn it in some yard?

She had no idea.

Who knows? Maybe she will end up posting it to some random site online after all...


	113. AN (Sequels!)

Hello!

First off:

Oh my God. 10k views. You guys are absolutely amazing. Thank you so much! This makes "ASOM" my very first story to hit ten thousand, definitely NOT what I was expecting when I first started it back in the summer! This is also my first fic to technically be completed online, so that's also _a-ma-zing!_ I can not express how amazed I am at the support that this fic received, so thank you from the bottom of my heart! This is truly a massive achievement for me! :D

Alright. So, it's been quite a ride hasn't it? If you're wondering why I haven't left any author notes along the way it's because of the fact that I didn't want to ruin the experience. I wanted this to feel like Artemis's mind and Artemis's thoughts (hence "ARTEMIS'S STATE OF MIND" in big, bold letter). Not, "AUTHOR AND ARTEMIS'S STATE OF MIND". That would just be weird.

It is with a heavy heart that I have to tell you that this story is indeed finished.

Artemis's story was one of heartbreak and many trials and tribulations. She was searching for Dick, but ended up finding herself. And, that's what really matters in the end. So, yes, there are many loose strings left at the end, and Dick's not found, but Artemis has her life back. She knows who she is, and maybe not all to come, but she's going to face it with a strong, clear mind and an unbreakable determination.

Her book is over.

That's not to say that she's "over" Wally's death in the slightest. But, she's come to accept it. Come to acknowledge it and take it all in one deep breath at a time. He'll always be on her mind, and sure, she'll sometimes burst into tears after a horrible nightmare.

But, she isn't lost anymore. That was the entire point.

If anyone is still confused (and if you are, I am very much confused as to how you got this far into the story?) this book was written by Artemis. Quite literally. That's why she sometimes slips into first person. Because it's all literal. This is kind of like her journal. Dinah gave it to her. So, that's why it may seem weirdly written. I'm not narrating it. She is.

But, there is a point to this author's note, more so than an explanation, so i'll just get down to it:

 **THIS FIC MAY BE OVER, BUT THE SERIES ISN'T.**

That's right! **There's going to be not just one; but TWO sequels to "ASOM" coming up in the near future!** Already in the reviews i've been asked what happened to Bart and Dick respectively, and you guys are awesome for catching on!

I feel the need to remind you that this is just ARTEMIS'S book. Dinah gave both Bart and Dick books as well, remember? So, the two sequels will obviously be centered around their books and their own "states of mind".

I don't want to give away too much, but I will say that Bart's book will be coming next, and then Dick's after that one. I also feel the need to say that these books will be a tad bit more...depressing and odder than this one (yes, it _CAN_ get more depressing! XD), so that's something to look out for. I'll probably leave a disclaimer at the beginning of Bart's, and then just let it play out.

Last but not least, to ease what I hope is curiosity blooming in each and every one of you, I shall give you the title of Bart's book so that you'll remember it when it eventually shows up:

 _"BART'S IMAGINARY FRIENDS"_

I enjoy caps, as you could imagine! ;)

Anyways. That would be all, I guess! I'll try to get the sequel(s) up soon, but school is draining and I have other fics to focus on as well! It's funny to think when I started this all, I had no idea where it would all go, but look at it now! Thank you to all the lovely reviewers (I LOVE reviews!) and for all the follows and favourites and 10K VIEWS, WTF GUYS.

(Sorry. Still not over it...XD)

I'm ranting, I guess! I just love you all so much! So, thanks again for everything, and please stay tuned for this sequel, and the next! Artemis's journey is over, but Dick's and Bart's have only just begun.

I shall see you soon (hopefully!)

-Sadness


	114. Sequel is out!

OH MY GOD, 20K, WTF GUYS!?

The sequel to this story is out! Go check it out under the title of "BART'S IMAGINARY FRIENDS".

Thank you all so much for the support! You guys are epic!


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